I’m back in Amsterdam..

This is my second time visiting. My sister and I arrived here a few hours ago and at current I’m sitting in my hostel bed at Euphemia Hotel. The room is bland and it smells like dirty socks, but we met these two girls who are traveling around Europe for three months. They are from New Zealand, Tanisha and Sophia. They’re the first people I’ve met from New Zealand. Tanisha, the one across from me on the top bunk, was writing in her journal, which inspired me to do the same. What was she writing about? Was I in it? If so, what did she say about me?

I wonder if I inspire people the way she and her friend inspire me. We got to talking about their travels. Wide eyed and curious, I asked them where they’d been, how long they’ve been traveling, what their favorite place has been thus far in their journey, and how they got to traveling. They’ve been almost everywhere…Barcelona, Italy, Mykonos, many more places I can’t seem to remember..but their journey led them here, to Amsterdam. Just like my journey led me here.

Sometimes I wonder if everything that happens to you in life has a purpose. Sometimes I believe it does, but other times I’m not convinced. I don’t know if I believe in destiny, but I think I do believe that everything happens for a reason. Can that be?

I wonder what purpose this trip will serve me and what new ideas I will extrapolate. What will I learn? Will they be big or small things?

Earlier on the plane I was reading Jedidiah Jenkins’ book, To Shake the Sleeping Self, and I felt so content afterwards. I feel like I’m on his journey with him. I feel like I’m riding my bicycle alongside him. His words, so articulate, made me feel free. Like I had no ties to anything in this world and it was just me, on my bike, flowing swiftly down the lonely road lined by trees and blackberry bushes.

I want to feel that liberation at least once in my life. I want be able to inspire myself to do things as daring and fortuitous as that. I want to be my own desire.